5 Habits to Embrace for a Deeper Intimacy With God
Tarah Avery
Have you ever been in a relationship where you just don’t feel like you’re known for who you truly are?
Maybe this person you’re in a relationship with – whether that’s friendship, marriage, dating, or a family relationship – doesn’t desire to hear your heart, know what makes you giddy with joy, or understand the deeper parts of your soul.
The depths of our relationship with God is dependent on our intentionality of spending time getting to know him and allowing him into the deeper parts of our souls. Which is nothing short of the work we put into developing other healthy relationships in our life. It’s reciprocal. One person cannot do all the work, it must be a two-way process where both parties are making an effort.
The more investment we put in, the greater the benefit, right? The deeper the intimacy, the more joy. The desire to be known by others may be hiding deep inside, but it’s there just waiting to burst free.
Relationships are scary things. They require that we lay our hearts out in the open with the possibility of being squashed and broken by others. But a relationship with God is different.
He knows you deeply and intimately because he created every part of you – your personality, your character, the color of your skin, the number of hairs on your head – and he desires to be known by you just as much.
Sometimes it is easy to just use God as the slot machine, hoping that you’ll receive all sorts of blessings and rewards by just pulling a lever (being good, having good morals and character).
Or maybe he is just “fire insurance,” as I’ve heard it called. You’ll use him to make sure you get to heaven and not the other place, but you don’t really want to devote your life to him.
It could be that your relationship with God is like this: you’ll go to him when you need him for something but otherwise want him to stay out of your life.
A relationship like this with God is a stale, boring, and lifeless one. Jesus says, “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly (John 10:10)” and throughout the pages of scripture we learn that without a relationship with him we cannot experience the life he dreams for us.
Leave your simple ways behind and begin to live.
So what are some habits that we can start working on to create a deeper intimacy with God and learn how to receive life to its fullest?
Go for a walk.
When my husband was single, he used to go on lots of walks. Walks helped him talk to God and oftentimes hear God’s instruction the clearest. He was single for 8 years before we got started dating for the purpose of marriage.
In those 8 years, there would be women who would catch his interest. And on those walks, he would talk to his Father about them. And what God always reminded him was this: trust in his timing and wait for his answers. He was not ready to date yet, after a hard breakup with a woman he was sure would become his wife, God knew what was better for his heart than he did. So he continued to trust in God’s timing and wait for the “go” to begin dating again.
To learn this discipline of trusting in God’s timing for the things you desire (marriage, career, children, etc.) and learning to wait patiently, practice the habit of going on walks. Because God always has your best interests at heart, and his timing is always perfect.
Stroll Down Memory Lane.
When in doubt, rely on his promises. Look back on your life. Really take a look. You’ll begin to see where God came through. God promises to never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). Remember that time when you were not alone? He promises good things for those who rely on him (Romans 8:28). Remember when you were unsure but you trusted him anyway? God promises to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). Remember that rut you were in? Where are you now?
Sometimes remembering what God has already brought you through and the blessings that he has already given you will help in your present circumstance. Practice the habit of strolling down memory lane to learn to rely on His promises.
Start A Dream Board.
Dreaming big is something that is not common. It can be scary, confusing, and seem impossible at times. The practical things in life blur our vision to the truth that God does miracles. We forget to believe for big things. But God is a big God! And it is within his power to do big things in your life if you believe that he can.
Practice the habit of dreaming. Start a dream board, write down the steps to get where you want to be in those dreams, and then believe they can happen for you. Because nothing limits God except what you do or do not believe about him.
Go Get Ice Cream.
This is similar to “strolling down memory lane.” We always want to remember what God has done in our life, but we also want to celebrate it. Celebrate! Rejoice in his goodness and the things he has brought you through and helped you accomplish. I don’t think we celebrate enough in our culture. Practice the habit of celebrating. Go get ice cream more often -and rejoice in God’s goodness.
Turn Off Your Phone.
Every Monday is Sabbath day in our home. It’s a day to unplug, enjoy a huge morning breakfast together (something different from the usual), and relax.
Sabbath day is a day to rest in God’s presence and recover from a long week of work. For us this usually looks something like reading all day long, going on walks, and sometimes watching a funny TV show -anything that rejuvenates us. But our phones are off – the world will be okay for a day without us. Practice the habit of turning off your phone, even for an hour a week, and relax in His presence.
I urge you to start practicing these habits right away. But try not to beat yourself up about it if you’re not perfect at it. According to Michael Hyatt, it takes 70 days to create a habit in your life, and I just gave you 5 to practice.
Pastor Andy Stanley talks about scheduling what you care about on your calendar. So I encourage you to make the time, schedule “dates” in your calendar, be intentional about them, and then watch and see how you begin to grow in your relationship with God.
The discipline will be worth it. I cannot wait to hear about your journey!
Which one of these 5 habits will you practice first?
I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!
All my Love,
